standing up for myself
by Cherry scarlet
Summary: A unexpected visit from Lvellie makes everyone at the order uneasy. Especially Lenalee, all she wants to do is hide from him. But with the help of Allen she is learning to face her fears.
1. Chapter 1

He's behind me, I don't even have to look. The way my knees feel weak, my breath is rapid, and even how those memories keep coming back to me. I want to run, cry, scream, but doing that won't do me any good. I know I should face my fears once and for all, after all these were the words a great friend told me.

*three days earlier*

Everyday at 8:00 a.m I wake up and get ready for my day. I take a quick shower, brush my long hair and put my protective black order outfit on, but today I decide to leave my hair down. After that I immediately go to the cafeteria to meet Jeryy. Once I meet him he always has the coffee ready for the science department. With a big tray in both of my hands I head to the science department. This is my daily routine where it's the same thing everyday, where I meet everyone sleeping with huge stacks of paper of their desk.

But today was different when I walk to the science department. Every single one of them was actually doing their work! There wasn't a single person sleeping. I was extremely shocked. It even took them a minute to figure out I was standing there with coffee in my hands. Reever was the first one to notice me. "Oh hey Lenalee sorry we didn't notice you, we were all busy with paper work". "I see that Reever for once you guys are, is there anything happening for you guys actually doing your work"?

The whole science department stop what they were doing, it was dead silent. Everybody knew what was happening but didn't want to tell Lenalee. Again Reever was the one to speak. "Umm yeah... Oh hey the coffees are getting cold let me grab those from you". "Oh okay thanks let me just grab nii-san cup". "Well Lenalee you better get going and give Komui his coffee he must be waiting" Reever said. "Yeah you right maybe he will tell me what's going on, but as usual I bet he's sleeping on his desk" Lenalee smiled.

Well I'm going now, bye guys good job. Lenalee said as she walked away. When she left the whole science department started to talk. "I feel so bad for her" one said. "We should of just told her the truth" another said. "Okay hush everyone!" "Komui will deal with this we need to get everything done before "he" gets here" Reever said.

Lenalee happily walk to her brother's office. She was thinking of new ways of waking up her brother from his sleep. Maybe I can say Allen and I are dating, he would really wake up then. Lenalee laughed as she open the door.

To her surprise she sall her brother working hard on his paper work on his desk. For the first time in a while Komui was actually doing his work. I took a step forward entering the room. If the whole science department is doing their work and my brother too, than something is really happening. Lenalee thought. Well here goes nothing.

Nii-san I brought your coffee. I smiled walking toward him. He stared at me with horror with his eyes. I froze in terror, seeing him like that scared me. But with a blink of his eyes his expression turned into a happy one.

"Thank you so much Lenalee this is just what I needed". His smile wad bigger than usual. Was I just seeing things? One second he looked terrified than the next he looked happy.

Lenalee sit down I have something important to tell you. So there is something going on! I knew it Lenalee thought. I walked over to the long couch and sat with my hands in my lap. "What is it nii-san" I question.

"This isn't easy to say but in a matter of minutes Lvellie will be here for a inspection". "He also has plans on being the head of the science department". Komui said concerned for his little sister. Lenalee stared at Komui as if he was playing a joke. She moved her hands to cover her face, in hope to believe this wasn't true. With her hands still covering her face she started shaking her head. "This can't be, please tell me it's not true". Lenalee said in the verge of tears. "Lenalee it does break my heart to tell you, but it's true". "If the science department and I can get our paper work done before he gets here, there is a slight chance I can still keep my job".

This can't be, I can't be separated from my brother again! My inner thoughts screamed.

"Nii-san is there anything I can do to help!" I said determined. "Lenalee all I want you to do is relax and try to stay calm when he gets here". Komui sadly smiled.

" I can't do that brother!" " I can never be calm if he's here!". "Not after what he's done with me!" I yelled at Komui. I ran out the door and exit the science department. Tears overflowed my eyes, over anger, over Lvellie, and my brother. But more importantly I was mad at myself for yelling at Komui, when he done nothing wrong.

I run even faster trying to reach my room so I can hid from this nightmare. I'm dodging people left and right, ignoring their concerns for me. I'm not that far to my room now just a couple steps and I'm there!

As soon as I turn the corner I bumped into a large built person. The force made me tumble back but a pair of hands caught me before I fell. I knew these hands way too well, the way they use to abuse me. I didn't have to look up, cause the person I ran into is Lvellie.


	2. Chapter 2

Hello! This is my 3rd fanfiction I ever wrote. So thank you everyone who read and review. And tips you think I can improve with my writing is greatly appreciated. Well hope you enjoy:)

I do not own Man and its characters.

It felt like time stood still, and Levellie and I were the only people in the whole black order. The only sound was my heart beating that wanted to jump out of my chest.

I couldn't talk it anymore, the only thing I could feel was his cold hands on my shoulder that pierced through my exorcist jacket. Why couldn't I move? My whole body felt like I been froze in place. Fear has taken complete control of me.

The only think I could do is cry. That's all I wanted to do right now. I close my eyes to try to block out my tears, because even if I wanted to cry it would do me no good.

I waited for him to squeeze my should in pain. Like what he use to do to me when I tried to escape the order.

But what i felt was far from pain. A warm feeling was on my left shoulder that shot through my body. That warmth made me feel safe and that I can overcome anything, like this fear right now.

I slowly open my eyes to find the source of this warmth. I looked on my left to see a smiling white hair exorcist. Reality shot back to me making me notice that Levellie and I wasn't the only people here.

The warmth was Allen's hand on my shoulder. "Allen" I managed to choke out. His smile never disappeared. "Hello Levellie how are you today?" Allen said talking to him.

"If you don't mind me I need to take Lenalee with me. So if I could take her with me that would be great." Allen said leaving no room for Levellie to reply. Allen grabbed Lenalee's hand and started walking to his room.

Levellie had to let go of Lenalee's shoulder, he didn't want to make a scene. His wicked smile displayed on his face. "See you later Lenalee." He coldly said.

Hearing those words Lenalee squeeze Allen's hand hard. While Allen was guiding her to his room she kept her head down.

"Hey Lenalee can you do me a favor and give my hand some circulation thanks." Allen said not looking at her.

"Ah sorry Allen I didn't know I was doing that." I blushed thankfully Allen didn't see. I loosen my grip, I didn't want to let go of his hand.

We reached his room where he let go of my hand and told me to sit down on his bed. I didn't question it and obeyed his command. He shut the door behind me and walked toward the bed. He sat down next to me and started at me.

Allen was just staring at me. The room was dead silent. He look like he was waiting for me to say something. I open my mouth to tell him what happen this morning but before I could I tasted salty water.

In my surprise I was crying! Just when did this happen? I looked at Allen and his arms were open, like he was inviting me to hug him.

More tears started to over fill my eyes. I accepted his inviting hug. I wrap my arms tightly against his back. I buried my face in his stomach and I screamed. I scream for the pain I was feeling and how scared I was.

"Wahhhh!" "Alleniwassoscared!" It was a muffled sound that came out. Allen giggled the vibration on his stomach made him laugh. "There, there just cry it all out." He rubbed her back. "You can talk when your done."

And so I did. It was a while before my tears stoped and all I was doing was sniffling. I finally calmed down and sat up wiping my eyes.

"I'm sorry about that Allen, it's just when he's here I start to loose it." "I try to control myself but my mind won't let me." Lenalee looked at Allen with her sad eyes.

Allen couldn't see his Lenalee like this. He wanted her to always be happy with her million dollar smile. He grabbed both of Lenalee's hand and put his on top of hers. Her hands were icy cold.

"Lenalee it's okay to be afraid, it's perfectly fine because what he did to you was unforgettable." He looked deep into her eyes. "I heard what he's trying to do to your brother." Don't worry some how we will stop him.

Lenalee gasped. So everybody knew about this but me. Okay I thought. "Allen he's here what about the science department! "What if they didn't finish their paperwork!" "what should we do?"

"There isn't much we can do, I mean right now the only thing we can do is try to convince him not to take the job."I can go to the science department right now and try to convince him not too." Allen stood up and said.

"Okay Allen let me go with you!" I stood up but I got pushed down by Allen. I landed softly on the bed. "Lenalee I'm sorry you can't go with me" Allen softly said.

"Allen why can't I!" I was mad at him. "Why won't you let me help you!" "Lenalee there is nothing you can do right now, if I confront him you would just freeze in terror". His eyes were pleading. "Please Lenalee stay here and get some rest i will take care of things."

He was right I'm useless I thought. "I'm sorry for yelling at you Allen, and if you see Komui tell him I'm sorry too." Lenalee said while laying down on Allen's bed. She didn't know how tired she actually was. All she knew that she can fall asleep right now.

Allen took his blanket and tucked her in. "I'll be back Lenalee." He smiled as he sall Lenalee already fast asleep. He thought her face was a Angel.

He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and admire her beauty. He leaned over and kissed her forehead. "Good night beautiful" Allen said as he walked out of his room.


	3. Chapter 3

Hey everyone! Sorry for taking so long on this chapter. I was really busy with school and practice. Well anyway I hope everyone enjoys this chapter and I hope you review, follow, favorite, and give any tips on how I can improve. Thanks!

I do no own Man

Blood was all over my face. Cuts and bruises surround my entire body. My wrist and ankles were tightly restraint to the icy cold table. My attempts to escape the black order lead to this again the torture room.

I tried escaping the black order about four times a week. I use to do it everyday but I got weaker. I just wanted to see my brother, I just wanted to feel happy again.

Freezing cold water from a bucket splashed my face. It felt horrible. I started to wiggle my arms to try to rub my eyes.

The sound of combat boots made there way to the other side of the table. I turned my head as best as I could to see what he was grabbing. A whip was in his hands. Not the whip again this was the most painful weapon he had.

He slowly walk toward me. I close my eyes the only way I can defend myself. The sound of the whip on my body could be heard throughout the whole black order. My screams were quieter than the whips.

My face,legs,arms, and body were now a bloody mess. He was finally done, but the last part of my torture was saying here for the night.

He walked away and put the whip back in place. He started walking toward the door. "Lenalee will you give up now?" He asked coldly. "No, Levellie I won't." I told him proudly. He turned off the light and closed the door leaving me in the darkness.

Why is my entire body shaking? I hear somebody calling my name, it sounds friendly and inviting. I still don't want to open my eyes, I just want to feel safe.

"Lenalee, Lenalee come on wake up!" "Your scaring me!" Allen said shaking Lenalee. She slowly open her eyes putting her hands on Allen's cheek.

"Lenalee you were screaming and shaking in your sleep, I tried waking you up." "Did you have a bad dream?" Allen said holding her hand.

It wasn't a dream it was reality." Lenalee sighed. She looked at Allen's face and saw a purple bruise on his left cheek.

Lenalee sat up and scooted closer to Allen, she cupped his face. "Allen what happen!?"

Allen started to laugh. Well whenever I tried talking to Levellie about not taking your brother's job he got really angry and punched me. I didn't want to make him angry anymore so I left.

"I'm sorry Lenalee I really did try." Allen bowed his head. Lenalee lifted his head up with both of her hands. "Allen don't be sorry I'm the one who should apologize." We should go together now to the science department." "I still need to deliver coffee."

"Alright let's go then!" He smiled as he help Lenalee out of bed. They left her room and started walking toward the kitchen.

Since Lenalee woke up later than usual she wanted to hurry and deliver the coffee. When they got there Jerry already had the coffee's on 2 trays.

"Thanks Jerry!" both of them said in unison. Jerry noded his head, he was busy taking a order.

Side by side Allen and Lenalee were on there way to the science department. "Allen, why is this suddenly happening?" Lenalee said depressed. "I mean I always knew he hated me, but why can he just stop." she pouted her lips.

"Lenalee im sorry this is happeing, but we will get through this together no matter what." Allen had on his famous smile.

Lenalee's face brighted when she saw Allens smile. "Thanks Alle..." she stoped what she was saying. Something caught her eye.

She sall Levellie exiting a room. Not just any room the room where her nightmares begain. Where she felt lonley, scared, lost. It was her tourture room when she first got here.

Lenalee stop walking and watch Levellie's every move. Her eyes remained big and open. Allen stop walking too and watch Levellie.

Levellie shut the door and was walking toward them. Lenalee's leg was already shaking, she try moving them but it didnt work.

Allen moved in front of Lenalee blocking Levellie from her. She closed her eyes, making her feel safe.

"It's okay Allen is here he will protect me" she muttered to herself.

"Good morning Allen and Lenalee" he smile fast. "Hi, if you excuse us we have somewhere to be." Allen tried to nudge me to let me go first. My legs couldnt move.

"Now just wait a minute I need to ask Lenalee something." He moved to the side to try to talk to Lenalee. Allen reposition himself. "Not to be rude but she doesnt want to talk to you right now or ever." Allen frowned.

"Okay thanks fine but than I'll tell you what i wanted to say and you can tell her." Levelle smiled. "Tell her what should she call me, chief Levellie, or head chief Levellie." He walked away.

As soon as Allen turned around he heard a loud crash of breaking glass. Lenalee's legs gave out on her. She covered her face and scream. Tears were crashing down everywhere.

Allen quickly put his trey down and carried her the opposite direction Levelle went. He didnt care about the mess right now he just wanted Lenalee to feel safe.


End file.
